We looked like all the other guys. We made sure that the parts that were in the light had just the right hue of mannerisms, movements & maleness. It was actually pretty easy. It's who were were - except for the gray areas. Those were about relationships - sex & who we bonded with.

We were Bi. In a class of 55 guys - I knew of 4 of us by the time I was 16. By the time I was 18, there were 14 of us - that I knew of for sure. The class had swelled to 69 guys by that time, though. 

It was my "fault" I guess.  I just brought it out of guys.  At five feet, ten - I wouldn't have been much of a threat to most guys. I guess I wasn't - even though I worked out all the time for gymnastics.

I wasn't afraid of anything or anyone either. I had made lots of friends with guys bigger than me who took a liking to my personality & attitude I guess.  The fact that I had a virtual harem of females following me around didn't hurt the image either or the number of guys who wanted to lek.

We all had started off "straight". Not a hint of girlieness or sissy among our core group.  Guys who didn't have the self-analyzing skills to abstain from being girlie or sissy got the "phag" label (from everyone - in general). That wasn't a good place to be & I had decided early on that I wasn't going to take chances on risking any labels that might cut me off from my buds.  It wasn't that I was inclined to walk with a lisp; - It was just going to be a goal of mine to make sure it never happened - even by accident.

The charade is that "Of course - we're all straight!  Sheeeshhh!"  Most of the time - it's an easy con to pull - until you get pinned the wrong way while wrestling with another hott dude.  I had a philosophy: Death before discovery. Nobody was pinning me anywhere.  The most intense journey of my life began when I was wrestling with my buddy Jason.  Jason was the cutest & most cocky guy I knew (beside me of course).  He was also fun & always flirting with trouble & other things...

Well - it was thanksgiving vacation - my Sophomore year & Jason was staying over for turkey-day.  Wednesday - after we got out of school early - we went to his place to get his stuff.  While we were there - Jase & I got wrestling just after he'd gotten out of the shower.  I pulled an awesome reversal & had him in an arm pin that was the ultimate uncle-maker.  With one arm locked in my legs & the other in am arm-bar - Jason was on his back & wasn't going to go anywhere.  He squirmed alot - with his legs hanging over the edge of the bed - bent at his knees.  That's when I noticed the bulge under his wet towel. The towel hugged his groin & unmistakably formed a dick-shaped pocket over where his swelling dick was.  Mine was safely hidden in my soft-jock.  Since I didn't want to put Jason on the spot - I let him go & pretended I didn't notice what was going on under the towel -- but I realized something: I might not be the only guy putting on the "str8-show". I didn't let on - but the whole idea really began to consume my thinking. I mean - it was Jase I was thinking about, & I had all these powerful feelings for him to begin with.  To think that he was playing the str8-card as well as I was; - well - I was going to see what I could figure out over the next day or so.

That evening at my house - we were up until about 1AM playing pool, X-box & eating non-stop.  Around 1 - I said I was getting tired (a lie) & suggested we hit the sack after showering.  My room was downstairs. I had bunk-beds - but I'd set them up side by side.  Since the footprint for the mattresses was a perfect square with the beds set up like that - I had them turned 90 degrees so that the seam between them ran horizontal across the middle of both beds.  I killed the light & dropped my robe - slipping into my side in the raw.  A few seconds passed & Jason did the same on his side.  My heart was racing.  I could hardly believe that I was in the same bed as Jase - buk nekk'd. Oh - and I had turned the heat in my room all the way down.  I knew it would get cold before too long - as far north as we were.  My bed had an electric blanket.  Jase's side didn't. 

I was a light sleeper.  Over the course of the night - as my nose got colder & my breath left a trail out of my mouth in the dimly lit room, Jason continued to fidget & curl up as the cold penetrated his thin blankets. I waited to hear him shift around again.

"Hey, Jase - you cold?", I whispered.

"Yeah...", he replied in a shivered whisper.

"Slide over onto my side...got an electric blanket.", I answered.

"You sure?", he questioned.

"Yeah...what would I tell people if you froze to death at my house?", I replied in a half laugh.  I lifted up my arm & formed a corridor under the large common blanket that overlapped us both.  Jase slid across.  As he did - I moved more toward the opposite side - just off center of my half of my side.  Jason took little time getting across to where the electric blanket beneath us threw off the heat.  With a low-pitched, soft maniacal laugh - I reached over & slid my right hand under his torso & wrapped my left over his lower back & pulled us together - so that we were taking up the space in the middle of my side. 

"Touched your buttcheek...", I chuckled.

"Your hands are warm...mmmmmm', Jase replied. He didn't pull away - but just laid there taking in the warmth.  I relaxed some & gradually rolled onto my back. Jason was on his side - facing me - a few inches away. I had to roll away because my dick was so hard that I thought I might accidentally club him with it - or he might discover how much I was really enjoying him next to me.  What I  really wanted to do was hug him & slide him on top of me face down - pec2pec - dick2dick.  I wanted to feel that strong body press into me with pounding heart & heaving abs.  I wanted to slowly explore him with my hands & feel his stubble lock with mine. But - I couldn't be sure of his feelings. He talked such a tough-line in public about needing pussy & hating fags.  Although we were close friends & although I knew the shape of a hard-on under a towel (from the view earlier that day at his house) ... there was a warning beacon flashing brightly in my mind's eye; --One that told me that if I offended him with my actions -- he'd destroy me at school with the phag label.  Even if I denied it - our friendship would be history.  I loved him way too much to rush into passion's rapture when the stakes were so high.  Whatever happened - it had to be mutual - equal.

So, I pretended to slide back into sleep - with little soft snores & occasional nonverbal quiet-vocalizations.  I heard nothing from him except faster than usual breathing. My hands were down to my sides. My right hand was palm-up - between Jase & me.  I had almost given up faking sleep & was about to slide into the real thing when Jase softly mumbled something & rolled toward me.  His right arm slid across my chest & his right leg slid knee first over my right leg.  His head rested on the pec side of my right shoulder and something large, warm & feeling like a soft-leather covered rubber baton - flopped into my open right hand.

It took all of 2 seconds for me to recognize the feeling of a semi-hard penis that was not my own - in my hand (well - at an angle that was different than what I was use to.)  My pulse went thru the roof as I visualized the situation in my mind.  My dick got so hard so fast that I knew was gonna eventually shoot without needing any assistance other than what was between my ears (caused by what was in my hand)!  My heartbeat was literally audible in my breathing.  I wasn't sure if Jase was setting me up or if he was asleep.  The temptation was too great...I bent my right wrist some to allow me to slowly grasp around his shaft & feel his heft in a gentle grip.  Doing so caused Jason to whimper softly & exhale some.  His penis immediately began to grow in length & girth as it fully hardened.  I was thinking that Jase had a totally respectable dick when it twitched really hard in my gentle grasp.  His breathing was now clearly fast & punctuated with his pounding heart-beat.  I knew how he felt.  I was totally out of control & ready to shoot knowing I had my buddy feeling this good.  Another strong throb stiffened his dick & with the very tip of my middle finger I could feel the space right below his balls get larger & harder as he whimpered a soft moan.  I firmed up my grasp just a little bit & gently bent my wrist back  (This slight motion retracted Jase's foreskin some).  As I did, he let out another whimper - more intense as his hand (across my chest) stiffened & curled in some.  Another hard throb started to build in his dick - but just got harder & more intense as Jason arched his back some & opened his mouth to gasp a little air.  Beyond the point of inevitability, Jase's loaded cock began to convulse repeatedly in my gentle grasp - about once a second causing a respectable wave of man jizz  to empty onto my lower right arm & wrist in hot gushes.  Jason moved his right arm down - sliding his hand over my ribs, abs & down onto my dick where he gently grasped it in his hungry grip.  In seconds my jizz covered his fingers as it erupted out of me.

It was the most incredible thing I'd ever felt - holding my bud's cock as he shot hott luv sauce all over my arm - totally out of control.  His breathing was waaay irregular - punctuated with gasps, sighs & little whimpers during his orgasm.  As I came down from my own experience - I began to feel a little bit awkward - with my buddy's dick still in my hand.  I had no doubt that he was awake & I wondered if he was going to freak out on me.
Before the panic got too intense - I realized something: He was probably feeling - maybe even thinking - the same thing I was.  I tried to imagine what he could say that would make me calm.

"Bro, - That was totally awesome...", I whispered with a smile on my face to influence the way it sounded. A few seconds passed.

"Really?", he answered nervously.

"Phuck, yeah!", I whispered back with enthusiasm in my voice. "Nothing feels better than to have someone you totally trust & respect give you a helping hand in that department."

"Yeah ... pretty great ...", he added - as I could hear the stress begin to leave his voice. I reached over the side of the bed & found my shower wrap on the floor.  Pulling it up under the covers - I wiped myself down & then turned it inside out & slid it against Jason's hand - still loosely around my dick. He brought his other hand over & used the towel to wipe himself dry.  "You don't have a problem with any of this -- like what people might say if they knew?", - he continued.

I thought for a moment on what I'd like to hear if I had asked that question. "Well...I'm not telling anyone -because it's nobody else's business.  Besides - it's not like either of us took anything up the arse!  The reason I like being with you is because you're 100% guy - not some substitute for a woman or anything disrespectful. Hey, every dude's gotta empty his nutt occasionally. Having another guy give a hand is about the best act of friendship two buddies can share - as long as it's mutual & stays a guy-thing."

"Man...", Jase began - with the tension almost gone from his voice.  "I was beginning to suspect that I was the only guy who felt that way...", he admitted.

"Dude...phags have given -'being best friends'- a bad reputation... You need to quit letting Will & Grace define the rules.  What do a couple of rump-rangers doing the butt-nasty have to do with what we just had - huh?  Nothing, Bro! Real men don't buttphuck their buds; - And our level of respect makes all the difference."

"Man, I'm so glad you said that...", Jason whispered in a sigh of relief. "That's one thing I'd never do; -- & I was waaay hoping that you felt the same."

"Dude", - I began - "The Butt-phuck is the act of disrespect; -- It's what makes a phag - a phag! You're my bud; -- Not some stand in for a khunt when I'm hard up! I wanted to be with you because you're as 'guy' as a guy can be. If I wanted to be with a chick - then I'd do that; - but being with a chick is different than being with a dude; -- & I never try to mix the two in my head."

"I've felt inside the same way for a long time...", he began. "Being with a chick is like celebrating the differences between us - ya know.  But there's this part of me that really likes what makes a guy - a guy. It's like I want to be able to tell certain guys that I really like being close to them & admire the things we have in common - as guys.". Jase took another deep breath, "I was beginning to think I was some sort of phreak for having these feelings for certain Bros - you being one of 'em. And tonite when I got into the same bed as you in the raw - I couldn't stop think'n that we might get close - touch'n each other.  When I felt your hand around my dick, - well,  it was the most intense thing I've ever felt - knowing that a guy like you was holding me & not freaking out.  I've never cumm so hard in my life, Bro. And now I have all these other feelings - like I want to be even closer friends ..."

"Same here Bro...", I replied as I reached over to him & pulled him closer to me.  He slid his right knee over mine & began to assume the same position he'd been in earlier -pushed against me. "Up you go...", I whispered as I guided his body on top of me so that we were nuts to nuts & navel to navel.  With a little repositioning of pillows - his head rested beside mine.  "There -- just relax into it & get cozy...", I said with a grin in my voice.

"Feels so great...being here ... with you like this; -- Like being this tight - there's nothing we can't handle?", Jase whispered.

I lightly rubbed my stubble against his & slowly began to explore his back with my open palms.  He softly sighed under the feelings of being cuddled & caressed.  His athletic, muscular body was quickly subdued as I slowly learned every muscle & crease with my massaging hands. Soon the little twitches & jerks that come with sleep overwhelmed him & his toned, relaxed body melded into me with all the nonconcern that complete trust exudes.

His warm nakedness was like a blanket of love across me.  His breathing was the slow regular rhythm that comes with sleep - punctuated occasionally with little vocalizations & movements. He was scented just slightly with soap & aftershave. He slept with his mouth barely open with a completely relaxed expression.  His jaw was wide & his eyebrows were thick - almost a solid line across his forehead - just barely thinning in the center - beneath which was a perfect guy nose.  He'd shaved with the razor set to fine-stubble & even less around his upper lip & down the sides of his face where a darker set of hairs highlighted a thin - pencil thick moustache that ran down both sides of his face to his chin line.  Just barely taller than the short-stubble, the effect was extremely masculine.  The hair on the centerline of his chest & abs loosely interlocked with mine & gently telegraphed to me his heartbeat & breathing.  At his crotch - the effect was magnified with his equipment resting with a sense of heft atop my own.  I slid my hands down low over his glutes slowly - circling outwardly & then back up along both of his sides. About a third of the way up I slid my arms around his back & gently hugged him a little tighter as I pushed my face lightly into the nap of his neck & then up so that our ears rubbed.  "So this is what love feels like...", I whispered. 

Jase softly vocalized a deep "Mmmm" & shifted his body position ever so slightly - cuddling into my hug.  I had to wonder to myself what could possibly make people fear & ridicule such an awesome exchange of trust & compassion between 2 people.  Was it the mere fact that we were both guys, naked & unashamed; - or was it because pornography's rumors slandered such exchanges - tainting them & reporting them as mindless, vulgar acts of self-serving pleasure?  Hmmm. It was quite a bit to think about - but feeling the love I had rushing through me for Jase - I knew that it was something never to be cheapened with street talk & disrespectful innuendos based on mere sex.   

The next day was just like any other - except for the fact I'd cut my heart out & give it to Jase if he'd needed it & I knew he'd do the same.  If you've ever had a friendship where you knew your buddy just loved you - without any reservations...That was our friendship.  Not clingy or needing daily insecurity management like flowers or candy. It just WAS; - solid, non demanding & absolutely real.  It was like two buddies sharing a deep river of compassionate feelings that knew no limits regarding the desire to see the other guy happy & successful; - all wrapped in a skin of respect & discretion. 

Jase was the 1st in my close inner "circle". Love is big & when you're a guy that other guys want to role model & spend time with; - Well, love's circle has this tendency to expand.  The amazing thing was how discrete it always was. Within a circle of guys who were all friends on the surface - there were certain close connections within the circle that were totally intimate - closer than family.  Who was hooking up with who became a real puzzle that I tried to work out over time.  In retrospect - I did a terrible job of guessing.  Not only did I not figure out lots of the guy/guy connections within my own class -- but within the school & even between guys in our school & other schools!  What time revealed was that there were lots of guys hooking up with other guys - who nobody would have ever suspected in the gay-terrified environment of straight-athletic locker-talk.  Of course - I found this all out later when I did a private study paper for a college course.  At the same time I was doing the paper - I stumbled onto g0ys.org - a site which allowed me to write a lot less because I included the link in a footnote. 

Anyhow, - the next person added to the 'circle' was a guy named Rick who moved into the area just before the holiday break.  Jase & I met him in the weight room period 2 after he'd been processed by the main office.  The guy was drop-dead handsome & it turned out - a year older than us - but in the same class because he'd been set back a year - (Military parents & a tutor shortage).  We gave him the tour of the gym's fitness center & did our best to make him feel at home in the "new school".  Rick was hunky, unassuming & easy going.  He seemed a great guy from first impressions.  He worked out really slow; - & considering his great shape, Jase & I figured that we'd take it slow too & pick the guy's brain for tips.  It turned out he knew quite a bit about turning boring workouts into explorations of self improvement.  When Jake asked him what the reason was for slow reps - Rick grinned & said that it made a better strategy when you were recovering from surgery.  Jase & I glanced at each other after Rick made the comment -but we didn't pry. 

The bell rang; - & between Jase & me meeting with Rick over the rest of the day in the hallway & at lunch - we talked him into getting together with us over vacation.  Wanting to make new friends, he agreed to hook up that Saturday at my place.  We'd wing it from there. 

Well, all three of us survived Good-Friday dinner & the leftover-aftermath.  On Saturday when we finally hooked up - we decided to check out the new ice rink just finished being built in town.  Rick didn't have a pair of hockey skates - so I let him use one of mine.  We hooked up with a few other guys at the rink & played loose-rule hockey until we never wanted to see another puck again.

It was an exhausting day.  Rick had seemed to be straining to keep up at times - but he was a good sport about everything.  By the time we got back to my place - it was past 10PM and Jase needed to get home for some family get-together early the next day.  I had my own private bathroom off my room so Rick & I cleaned up there & got ready to settle down & watch some TV or something.  Rick went thru his stuff & commented that he was out of muscle relaxants.  I asked "what for" & he told me that they helped post surgical complications. I pried a little further & asked what he'd gone under the knife for.  He paused a little bit & with a grin said that he'd recently been deschmuk'd.  "Huh?", I asked - not making the connection.

"Circumsized", he whispered loudly. "3 - Almost 4 weeks ago."  Looking at the cloverleaf Roman tub he changed the subject. "Hey is this a Jacuzzi too?"

"Yeah - we got all the add-ons."  I pushed 3 buttons & the tub began to fill with assist from the high speed jets.  "Takes about 3 minutes to fill. It's just on this side of scalding hot.", I added - in case Rick wanted to set it cooler.  I added a pint of ethyl-alcohol to the water.  "Might as well get clean too...", I added.  Can't use soap in these or you get a wall of foam - like that episode of the Brady bunch."  Rick looked puzzled. He must not have seen that rerun about the detergent. Looking around, I saw we needed towels. "Step in whenever.  I'll go get a couple of large towels."  I left the bathroom & hunted up a few towels & 2 bathrobes.  I was just a little bit curious as to what Rick looked like in the raw. 

Man - was I glad that I hit the gym on a regular basis.  It was becoming more & more obvious that I never knew who I was going to find myself naked with.  When I got back to the bathroom - Rick was still standing there - going thru his overnight bag.  I handed him a large towel - which he put around his waist & then reaching underneath - pulled his already untied shorts down & then kicked them off. 

I opened the medicine cabinet & let him look: "Anything in here you need?" 

Rick looked. Nope.  Need muscle relaxants.  I thought for a second & handed him a pint of the alcohol.  This is ethyl. Same as is in booze.  Take a swig & you'll be at "relaxed" in no time. 

Rick looked at the bottle. "No shit?", he asked. 

"Dude - getting the answer wrong on this test is serious.  Trust me. It's 192 proof with just a hint of mineral water.", I grinned.  I watched in shock as Rick downed half - shotgun style.  Then he coughed - only once- but a good one. "Bro - that's not a beer.  You just drank the equivalent of 6 shots.". 

"That should relax it.", Rick smiled.  Taking a few steps, he lowered himself into the large Roman tub.  "Wow- that water is hot!", he commented as he slid into it.  I stepped in from the other side & tossed my towel up onto the hamper before settling down.  The jets made the water white like milk without any big bubbles - just trillions of small ones - ozone enhanced. 

Taking a few deep breaths I panted, "Gonna let the jets & bubbles get the grime off.".  Another few breaths & one last deep one & I slid down into the froth.  The water had so much air in it that it lost most of it's buoyancy. Underneath it, I could hear the sounds of the air-jet motors much louder & took note of how the water full of zillions of little bubbles felt moving over & around me.  "I sure wouldn't want to be a germ in here...", I thought to myself.  Being able to stay under water for up to 3 minutes, I relaxed & enjoyed the "pseudo-dry-cleaning sensation".

After about a minute, Rick asked, "Hey, are you alright down under there?"  I guess a minute seemed like a long time to him.  He slid a foot under me from the side & began to lift. I found it humorous & locked his leg in one arm while I scoped for his free one with my free hand.  I could hear him beginning to laugh as he tried to keep his free leg out of my grasp - but it was no use.  Soon I had both of his legs & I was pulling him away from the tub's side.  He was trying to free his legs & splashing around as he slid off the side-seat into the deeper water.  I slow-surfaced like an enemy sub at his feet.  As I opened my eyes - I immediately was met by one of the most beautiful sites I've ever seen.  The towel had slid off him!  Time seemed to run slowly & the details of the white tub vanished as my dilated pupils drank in the sight worth remembering forever. Rick glanced down at his cock - large enough to make some horses flee in shame. "Without my meds, I get hard about once every hour.", Rick smiled - his body blushing red from the heat & the alcohol - taken on a near-empty stomach.  I wondered to myself if timing was the only reason he was hard.

Sliding along the tub side, I slid back toward Rick's upper body & while I sat - more or less Indian-style; - I supported his neck & head with my lower-left arm; -His lower back & butt -with my knees; - And I held up his knees with my right forearm.  This let Rick relax & back-float in my support. 

The discoloration above the circumcision scar was almost the same shade of light magenta that his whole body had become in the tub.  "How come you decided to get the surgery?", I asked - wondering why a guy with such an incredible cock would be dissatisfied. 

"Tight hood", - was his reply.  "Painful."

"Wow - drastic.", I commented. 

"The old man was wondering why I wasn't dating like he was at my age. So I told him & we arranged the surgery.", He answered - glancing at me as if he almost expected me to not believe the story.

Not knowing what else to say, I repeated, "Wow"; --And then shifted around some so I was cradling his head in both hands & supporting his lower back with my outstretched right leg. "Trust me" I said as I lowered his head carefully into the froth so that his eyes, nose & mouth were above the water-line.  I slowly made my hands crawl around his submerged head - moving his hair & making little scratching sensations all over his scalp as I went.  Rick groaned softly in pleasure.

Gradually, I rinsed his short beard with handfuls of frothy water & then his chest & armpits - taking my time getting ample water to move through the hair so the ozone containing bubbles & dissolved alcohol could effect their cleaning.  After 15 minutes, I suspected Rick was probably near the full effect of what he drank.  His muscles were sure relaxed - except for (1) group of them.  "Trust me?", - I asked again.

Rick opened his eyes & with a half dazed look answered, "Sure buddy..." & then he smiled with a 6-shot grin.  With my right hand, I started on the inside of his right thigh & with a cupped hand I moved a few ounces of water up and along his inner thigh to his balls where I stopped & let the water rinse up over his pubes & lower shaft.  Then I repeated the process as best I could for the left leg.  Each time the warm water washed over his nuts, Rick would exhale some in pleasure.  Well, he gradually spread his legs a little bit; - Which I felt was a nonverbal invitation to service his penis in a fuller capacity.  Cupping my hands just beneath his balls I moved handfulls of water over & around them as my palm & fingertips made intermediate contact.  Rick groaned a little more intensely than he had been & his penis began to near maximum hardness as his testicles pulled up closer to his groin. 

"Relax & just go with this...", I whispered as I gently put my hand around his man-shaft so that my thumb rested on the frenulum nerve bundle just below his glans.  With a single stroke down along it's centemeter length, Rick's whole body jumped a little as he gasped.  His penis stiffened in a solid twitch in my gentle grasp.  With only my thumb, I began to gently & regularly stroke along that little bundle of nerves.  The effect was electrifying on Rick.  His gasp immediately became a whimper.  His back arched & his knees straightened lifting his hunky feet & toes out of the froth where I saw that the toes on his left foot were curled in tightly - while those on his right were spread & straight - but in a moment they were all curled tightly.  A few moments later both of his legs moved down so that his feet were against the bottom of the tub as his back arched & his spasming legs pushed his butt up some.  Meanwhile, his penis was at peak hardness & had a purple color as his prostate filled.  "No holding back bro - make it worth the trip.", I encouraged softly. As I slow-tortured his ejaculatory reflex with the gentle loving movements of my thumb, - Rick clenched his teeth and bent his head back in the strong support of my left hand. Making it "worth the trip", he let out a groan of relief as the muscles along the inside of his sexy man shaft propelled his first rope of man-seed into the air up past his head & into the water recycle-intake of the tub.  'Good shot', I thought to myself.  A second or less later, his second shot went about a meter -- mostly hitting the frothy water where the temperature would be sure to gel it nearly instantly & then the currents carry it to the filter.  The third & forth shots went nearly as far with the 5th & 6th hitting just to the right side of his upper chest.  Watching his raptured responses made me dump my load into the water beneath him at about the same time.  Soon, the arch on his back relaxed some & his legs relaxed - letting his less frantic toes break the surface again where they spasm'd sporadically as his exhausting penis let loose the last few volly's of warm jizz that drooled onto his abs into a small pool - mingling with the frothy water.  I waited until the last few twitches subsided.  Then I cupped a few handfuls of water & sloshed off his abs & chest.  "Man, bro - you splooge a river!", I commented - followed by a soft, deep, passionate sexy growl.  In any case,  I figured a couple of minutes would get all our jizz into the filters & out of the water.  I just stroked his perfect male body & cuddled him in the meanwhile. 

"That felt so good,...", Rick slurred as he put his arms around me & hugged.  "It was like having my hottest dream happen."  With that statement, Rick had told me what he DREAMED about and I suspected even more that his lack of dating had not been due to a "tight hood".  'WTF!?', I thought to myself.  'Did this guy go as far as hacking his foreskin in order to stay under cover about who he really wanted to be with?', my inner voice spoke in concern to me.

"Rickster...", I smiled. Rick looked at me. "No matter what - we're buds - ok!", I spoke softly with seriousness in my voice. "I totally phuck'n respect you; - I gotta make sure you know that...", I continued.

"Yeah ... I know; -- I'll remember...", Rick said.

"Remember it Bro - because if anyone - even your own mind tries to disrespect what we shared here; -- Well, those voices are full of sh1t.  We're tighter than Bros now...I've got your back 24/7...OK?"

Rick smiled with some water welling in his eyes.  Cuddling into me he whispered, "Phuck yeah...Bros...I like that..."

His enormous erection had finally gone down & we got out of the tub; -- dried off & crawled into my bed - still in the raw.  As I lay there with my body entwined with his, I couldn't help think to myself how much I loved this guy after only a few days & how much I still loved Jase.  That's when I realized that love was bigger than people talked about. You could love 2 people - maybe more - all at the same time & not have to make the choice of which "one" to be with.  After all: To find one diamond on the ground would be satisfying to most people.  However - if you find a second, - does it diminish the value of the first; -Or is the value of the second and less because of the existence of the first?  What of a third or a forth?  There is no danger of each diamond's existence lessening the value of the others.  The only "danger" is that a person might become bored with diamonds in general if he was to take them for granted!  I gently increased the force of my hug on Rick. He groaned a little & then hugged me tighter in response. "I'll take a friendship like this over diamonds any day...", I whispered.  Rick mumbled & lightly kissed my jawline.  Then he drifted off to sleep.

I stayed awake for a while. As Rick slept, I slowly stroked along his virile body.  His skin was soft, young & coated with a dusting of man fur.  The undersides of his strong arms were nearly hairless -unlike the tops; --But the hairline thinned at his wrist just above his hands.  His hands were strong & wide with some soft callusing on his palms & undersides of his fingers.  Although I couldn't see any of this - my hands told me everything as I explored his features like I explored Jase.  There were lots of little differences between the two -- but both guys were stunning in their own ways.  One of the most obvious differences was the amount of hair on Rick's legs.  Below his butt cheeks, it got thicker.  Changing my position some - moving down some; - I was able to position his body so that as he laid partially across me, -his left leg was bent at the hip & at the knee - so that I could tender it with my outstretched right arm/hand.  Like his wrist - his body hair thinned out at his ankles - leaving his feet (except for the tops of his arches & toes) hairless.  His feet were a little bit shorter than Jase's -- more like mine.  They were wide & more calloused.  His toes were perfectly aligned & symmetrical and being softer & more vulnerable -- they were also more sensitive to light touches & the slow strokes of my fingers caused them to wiggle some in a sleepy effort to escape the light tickles.  His calves were huge & the musculature on his legs in general was extremely well developed & powerful feeling. 

As time passed into the next hour, Rick's breathing got deeper & his penis - which had been flaccid -began to inflate.  I figured that it was probably a reflex caused by his exposed glans tricking the body into thinking that his foreskin (recently removed) was retracted for some reason & the erection was natures way of setting the mechanism back into proper positioning.  As I felt his erection growing up against me, I rolled him off me onto his back.  He was still out cold. 'Lush' - I thought to myself as I grinned at him in the dim light.  At this point, my eyes had adjusted to the darkness & I could make out his features.  His short but full facial hair was soft - more like the hair on his head then what you'd expect in a beard.  My beard was still uneven so I kept my shave close - except a half moustache.  Jase said it was "hott", so I kept it.  Ricks was more natural -- country boy like.  His chest was framed with thick strong bones where muscles of above average development were anchored.  His development wasn't huge - but powerful looking & extremely sexy with the light dusting of hair that thickened some around his nipples & down his sternum-center to his pleasure trail.  Of course - I couldn't make out much of the pleasure trail because most of it was being obscured by an above average sized penis that almost looked out of place sprouting between his legs over a good sized scrot.  The tip actually was about a half-inch above his navel & the girth was big enough for me to barely get my hand around (& I have good sized hands).  The most awesome thing was that this beautiful 'wrapper' was around a warm masculine soul that was gentle, trusting & full of empathy - mixed with a good streak of cocky-competitiveness.  The guy was a walking, talking luv-drug of male seduction.   

I slid partially onto him & rested my head over his chest so that I could hear his heartbeat as I wrapped both arms around his lower torso.  His heartbeat was regular & powerful.  He let out a soft groan & slid his right arm up around me so that his hand was gently resting on the back of my neck - lightly squeezing intermittently. His heartbeat began to quicken.  I gently slid up and on top of him so that we were pec2pec, balls2balls.  He gasped some as my erection slid onto his.  Positioning with my knees on the outside of his legs - & pressing down into the mattress some; -I elevated my waist just enough to allow me to slowly slide my hardness over his.  Rick was not used to all the gentle compassion slowly coaxing his groin toward orgasm.  He groaned & slowly writhed around beneath me as his large penis helplessly stiffened & amorously surged under the thoughtful loving nudges from mine.  All the naked skin contact -with his obvious lack of experience -was too much for Rick to control or even delay his orgasm.  He slid both of his muscled man-huggers around my back & pulled our chests tightly together as his back arched some.  I lowered myself down onto him & pulled my legs in tightly beside his as I gently thrust forward some to keep his glans under pressure.  With our cocks pressed together along their length - I could feel the muscles along his squeeze hard -from his balls toward tip -as his hot-wetness filled the creases between our cuddled 6-packs.  He spit out a whispered-cry as the feeling expressed itself through his overwhelmed senses.  It was then I began to have my nutt & I gently but firmly used my climax to paint his spasming erection with a coat of hot buddy lotion & used the slickness of it to increase the pressure of my slow controlled thrusts to bully-luv every last muscle contraction out of his orgasm.

Eventually -- the event subsided - leaving only warm feelings, heaving abs & pounding hearts.  Rick's hug was still firm & his hands slowly explored my back.  Our faces were side by side & I could feel hot tears occasionally run between them - down thru the hairs on his teen-beard.  "Hey, you are totally loved Bro....Know that...", I whispered to him.  I could feel him nod gently as he hugged me tighter.  The wet warmth between our faces increased as he let more silent tears escape.

Well - the next day we stayed in bed for a long time talking things out. Turns out that Rick has zer0 interest in the female persuasion.  His family is from an odd, conservative lot of bigots: Part Republican, Part Fundamentalist & Part White-Supremacists; -From what I could gather.  I'd been partly correct in my guess as to the real-reasons he'd had the 'surgery'.  But - he said he didn't like the way his hood looked when he was really flaccid or cold -- so I accepted his reasoning for his decision.  However - his family (like everyone else except me) was clueless as to where his real affections lay.  I made it clear that his affections could lay with me anytime he needed a bro to cuddle with; - And if he EVER needed a place to stay - my window was open to him 24/7 (even if it was a narrow basement window painted black & covered with a poster). 

Funny thing was that about 2 weeks later at about 3AM -- there was a tapping at the glass of my little window.  Rick slid thru it ok & told me about his RepubliDrunk father who like to hang with Jack Daniels & Old Grandad until he got to preach'n about politics, jeezuz & how WAPs were wrecking the country.  Well - because some of Rick's friends were off-white, this formed the great excuse for RepubliDad to decide to pick a fight over it.  Rick had slid out the back door when he heard his mom confront AngryDad that it was almost 3AM & he should leave Rick alone. I helped Rick out of his dirty clothes & handed him a towel wrap & told him to help himself to the shower.  After the trip over to my house in the drizzle and mud outside - he needed one. 

After about 15 minutes, I was wondering if Rick had been sucked down the drain or something & besides - I needed to piss; - So I sauntered into the bathroom and as I stood there at the toilet doing business, I looked over at the shower door.  Wow - talk about a picture! It was after a few moments that I realized that Rick was standing there - kind of spacing it - not moving much.  "Hey, Bro - you OK?", I asked as I slid back the shower door.  The patterned curtain liner let just enough detail through to let me see that Rick had a somber - almost sad look on his face.  He glanced at me & slid the liner back.  His proud man-cock was standing up with the circumcision scar line only barely visible now.

"Am I some kind of a freak?", He asked with all of his emotional self esteem hanging on my answer.

I grinned - replying, "As in 'FREAK' ... if you mean that 99 out of 100 guys would gladly trade in their thumbs to have THAT hanging between their legs - yeah...".  I glanced again at his manmember & then back at his face - now grinning back at me. "I hope you're not gonna get anything started in here that I can't finish ... with him...", I smiled glancing back down at his erection.

Rick's half-grin had become a full-blown smile.  Seeing all that beauty wrapped in a man skin made my knees weak. "You always know what to say to make me feel better.", He commented - stepping out & beginning to towel off..

"Just speaking the truth, Bro.', I replied. "Not afraid to give credit where credit is due. I've been studying the Greeks. Not only did they have the balls to tell their buds when they were hott - but they lived in a culture where buds could hook up without anyone yelling 'fag!', - because butt-phuck'n was illegal & men were expected to act as if they had a pair; -- Nothing like the drag-queen crowd of today - not content unless they have a dildo up their arse!"

Rick let out a deep laugh. "What's insane is that I never knew that there were other guys who felt like I did before I met you.  I always saw the whole gay scene as a meat-market of disrespect that smelled like sh1t! You know - even in sex-ed class as a freshman the people teaching it are saying things like "Use a rubber every time" -implying what about those who 'might be gay'!?  I sat in that class playing it straight... -terrified to think that another guy might want to plow my arse or want me to do that sick sh1t to him! Butt hey, that's the gay message; - And I didn't want anything to do with people who did that, or people who hung out with people who did that!"  Rick stopped talking -- seeing my huge grin. "What? What's so funny!?", he prodded.

"I was just thinking that any phreak who wants you to plunge your horse-cock up their arse had better have life insurance with a stupidity-rider!", I replied - with laughter-tears in the corners of my eyes. "...Have better luck getting your arm up there!", I continued - the laughter-tears now flowing.

"Well...", Rick began..."That would be the opening move for a pretty darn convincing ventriloquist act."

I stepped in toward Rick & buried my face in the crevice between his neck & shoulder to muffle my laughter as he hugged me tightly & laughed so hard there was no sound, - just straining muscles with occasional gasps for air.

Just as we'd begun to recompose ourselves, Rick asked: "Hey - what do you call a guy with his arm half way up a horse's arse?"

I shook my head, "Dunno..."

"An Amish Mechanic!", he spit out - just ahead of more body rocking laughter that seized both of us as it had before.

A few minutes passed and as before we began to recompose ourselves when I asked Rick: "Hey, how does a butt-phuck'r fake an orgasm."

Rick looked at me with an expression that knew a formidable punchline was on the way as he said, "How?"

I replied: "He screams & then throws a cup of hot yogurt on your back!"

His deep warm laughter was infectious. We hugged -tightly burying our faces in each other - trying to keep our voices to a whisper as the tears & sweat flowed.  Exhausted, our knees buckled & we ended up laying on our sides on the clean tile floor still hugging & trying to breathe between jocular spasms.

After a few minutes passed, we recovered from our fit & decided to take a quick shower together to rinse off before going to bed.  "Know what's great about being a guy?", Rick asked.  I looked at him & shrugged. "Being able to piss in the shower...", he continued as he sent a stream directly into the drain from his stance near the corner of the stall. 

"Better watch the aim on that...", I said as the stream passed my leg on it's way to the drain, "...or you'll be piss'n sitt'n down." - I continued with a challenge-grin on my face.  Rick checked out my expression -- seeing if there was any weakness in my resolve not to be pissed on.  Before he could reach a verdict - his supply went dry.  "Good decision...", I smirked.

"Bluffer...", He replied.

"As if I could do anything to intentionally hurt you, Bro...", I smiled while wrapping my arms around him.  Cuddling my muscles into his, I gently nuzzled his neck & moved up to nibble on his right ear.  He began to chuckle in response & his erection began to grow at once.  Turning the water off, I grabbed a towel & dried us both off.  We each put on a waist-wrap until we got near my bed - where we dropped them & slid under the covers together  Rick wasn't the only one hard at this point, - so we snuggled up face to face - him sliding on top of me - slow cuddling & enjoying each other until we came in gushers.  I just let him drift off to sleep - right on top of me.  I totally loved my 2 best buddies.  Down deep, I hoped they'd love each other just as much.

I convinced my parents to let Rick move in with me to save him from his drunk father's insane behavior.  Even Jase agreed that it was a good idea.  We put up a wall & sheet rocked it to divide my large room into 2 - for the sake of appearances.  We still shared a bathroom & a bed (making one was easier than making 2).  Of course- when Jase would stay over on the weekends or vacations, I'd insist that he sleep in my room - on an air-mattress.  Of course - the air mattress didn't get much use & Rick & Jase eventually took a liking to each other & liberated many pent-up sperm between the two of them over time. 

We never took each other for granted.  We just loved & shared everything in common.  We were closer than brothers and by the time we added Jon to our group, - we had an ongoing debate-of sorts.  I began to suspect that most guys would give their left nutt to have the kind of friendships we shared. Jon & Jase were skeptical but each totally dependant on us guys to help them pump one out, so they suspected we just lucked out & had special friendship chemistry between us.

Well, not being one to let a matter of this importance slide, I suggested we do an experiment to find out.  Once I described it, the other 3 guys said they were "IN".  My belief was that most guys actually want to do the pelvic grind with their buddies - & can be coaxed into it gradually if the peer-pressure is right.  What the 4 of us were going to do was:

1. Target one of our hott buddies
2. Create the right kind of bonding peer-pressure
3. Let time & affection work on the guy
4. Let the other guys know when he became (CAME being the operative term) one of US...

We decided that the fastest way to break a guy down was wrestling, tickling & massage.  We came up with a strategy to make quick work of the 1st 2 parts & skip right to the 3nd.  Rick suggested that we use the large cloverleaf tub in my bathroom to 4-way pin a dude & the tickle him insane.  Each of us could pin an arm or a leg & with our free hand - slowly loose all the tickle-demons.  The plan that once the guys was exhausted - to switch into a 4-way massage on him & kill his inhibitions with kindness. 

Of course - noise would be an issue.  If we had a little less than a foot of water in the tub - we could pull the big insulated cover down over it - once we had our victim pinned on the bottom.  That would muffle the noise, & the water-circulator pumps hum would mask out lots more of it.  If I had my TV or radio up loud - it should mask out the rest.  It sounded plausible - in theory...Now to test it.

Well, the 3 of them got into the tub & we pulled the cover down.  Unless they were yelling - I couldn't hear a thing -& then only a little.  They said that the light was really dim with the cover on & that we'd have to remember to turn the water temperature way down to where it felt "clammy" getting in.  Rick found a way to make the air jets run with the cover down and we used a long arrow shaft from my archery set to create a long, diagonal hole thru the foam cover so that the air that the jets brought in could exit without too much noise escaping.  It worked like a charm!

The general scheme was set.  All we needed to do was get our first 'victim' to come over.  We picked Friday nights as the best night to pull the tub-torture because based on where things went - we might want to have a "sleep over". We decided to decide on our first this week at School.  Because we felt that the 4 of us could pin any other guy -- class wouldn't be an issue.  Seniors would be fair game! 

It was kind of fun that week -- generally scoping out the campus.  I knew immediately who I was going to nominate when I saw Brad Giles almost jump out of his skin when his brother Shawn snuck up behind him & gave him a gentle poke to the ribcage while Brad was drinking a soda.  Soda went everywhere & Shawn got a beating (but still gained respect in the eyes of his freshman peers).  Brad was a football nut who was always complaining about being 'sore' from workouts, tackles, etc.  I brought the name up to our group & they agreed.  Brad Giles was to be our 1st victim.  He was a year older than everyone but Rick - so Rick would do the invitation.  Rick rented a "superbowl highlights" video for that weekend & told Brad there was gonna be a get together over a "really-kewl friend's" (my) house (& where he was also staying) late Friday night to watch the video & hang out.  "He was all over it dudes....", was Rick's report.

That Friday - after practice (everyone's respective), we finally met at my house just after dark.  My parents were gone for the weekend to their timeshare up north - so things were shaping up better than I had planned.  Brad showed up with his football stuff jammed into his huge duffle bag.  I made instant pizza in the microwave while the other guys got the video going.  I made sure to set my room temp at 73F - so that clothing might become optional as people got excited.

Well, we ate, drank & made smalltalk while the video played. Brad was the most excited - making sure to play things in slow-motion & then he wanted to see all of the DVD's special features, interviews & commentary.  I think the 4 of us just enjoyed watching him bounce around on the bed as he got excited over certain "historic" plays.  It was interesting - having him grab onto the nearest guy to 'celebrate' as play after spectacular play was showcased.  Despite his size & enthusiasm - he was really gentle.  Sure enough - after about an hour of him offering animated commentary, the shirt came off.  The guy was seriously built.  He showed off a little flexing - but commented that he was too sore to really give the full show.  The 4 of us guys glanced at each other -- all thinking the same thing: It would be easier to take down a guy who's sore from working out.

After 3 hours of DVD, commentary, replays & eating; I casually commented that I felt like taking a spin in the hot tub.  My 3 accomplices agreed that it sounded like a great idea.  Brad was all for it too - so we casually threw the plan into gear.  The tub had just about 8 inches of frothy water in it - under the lid.  We (the 4 of us) got stripped down to our micro-briefs & put towel wraps over them.  Meanwhile - Brad was in the raw under his wrap.  Closing the door, I dimmed the lights & then we pulled back the lid revealing a suspiciously shallow water level - frothy with bubbles.  Brad gave a slightly confused look while the 4 of us conspirators grinned brightly.  We pulled off out towel wraps revealing that we were in briefs; - & before Brad could comment, I had his right arm & Rick was on his left.  Jase got him by the left leg & Jon got his right. Laughing & thrashing, we slowly put him down on the bottom of the tub - where the tight space & close quarters helped in subduing his struggles.  Rick reached up with a free arm to the cover release & down it came.  The light was dim but the air fresh because of the bubbles constantly renewing it from outside. 

Looking at the large laughing grin on Brad's face, I smiled & said, "Initiation time Bro...".  That was our signal to begin the attack.  Jase & Jon started lightly scratching Brads captive feet as he arched his back & yelled "Noooooo!", just before laughter exploded out of his mouth & his body was racked in struggles to break free.  It was then that Rick & I began to gently wiggle our fingertips into his ribs.  The effect was much more intense than with his brother's teasing poke.  Brads loud yelling was broken up with laughter & gasps as he wiggled with all the energy his sore muscles could muster - but to no avail.  Soon the velcro holding his towel wrap gave way letting the ends of the wrap slide down off his waist - revealing a large beautiful uncut, flaccid penis about 5 inches long that  helplessly flopped back & forth on top of large balls -as he alternated his thrashing from left to right leg & then back.  Because our tickling was gentle & thoughtful - he was spared the pain of less experienced handlers - but because he was so ticklish, he was unable to regain his composure once he lost it. He was on pure, thoughtless, animal adrenalin as he yelled & pleaded for us to stop - in tortured laughing gasps & whispers.  After about 15 minutes of gently tickle torturing him - his exhausted body twitched & flinched as the fight drained out - leaving him red with engorged veins all over his body, - & laughter mixed with crying-pleas from what was left of his tortured voice.

"Recovery" was the next word I spoke.  It was the key word that signaled the end of tickling & beginnings of massage.  4 pairs of hands went to thoughtfully slow-massaging his body.  It took about 30 seconds for Brad to figure out what was happening & then he turned into mush as his body slid into complete relaxation.  We got every toe - every tendon - at least twenty times.  The goal was to give him a full hour's worth. We did that & more.  Brad just lay there - almost floating in the frothy water - never having had an experience of such opposites in his life.  Eventually, Rick stood up - opening the lid covering us up -& letting the dim light from the bathroom flood into our torture chamber.

We carried Brad out of the tub - each holding him by the respective arm or leg we had been pinning earlier.  We laid him down on Rick's bed & took turns drying him off as we stepped out of our wet briefs & dried ourselves - putting fresh towel wraps on.  The 4 of us worked a vitamin-E based lotion deeply into Brad's skin until there was no residue left.  He didn't say a word - just occasionally moaning under the feeling of 8 hands that knew where it felt 'good'.  The 4 of us all noticed that he didn't sprout any wood. The question in all of our minds was if he was simply too overcome with relaxation to have any sensual thoughts?  Since it was so late - we decided to pull the beds together and crash for the night.

So, when the lights went out - there we were - 5 guys across 2 connected beds & Brad was in the center with 2 arms around him from beneath (1 from each guy on each side) and 2 arms around him from above - 1 per guy who was atop & face down on the guy to his sides.  Turns out that Brad was just one of those guys who couldn't keep his eyes open while he was being rubbed on.  I'd never seen the effect before meeting him - but over time, that's what we figured out.  Like an alligator flipped onto it's back that stops thrashing when it's stomach is rubbed -- well, that's Brad.  The next day - he was a different guy in some respects. He was a lot more comfortable simply "being" around the guys in our group & actually opened up & talked some about personal issues that were deeper than football. It was astonishing to see how intensely appreciated the groups bonds were appreciated -- other guys who really cared without having to become women in order to express emotions of genuine interest & concern.

Eventually, he succumbed to Jase's charms (first).  This was about 2 weeks later while he was visiting Jase at his place.  Brad later explained that being around the 4 of us guys who were always wrapped around each other when relaxing, watching TV or sleeping; - He explained that it just seemed to be a natural extension of being great friends & when we pulled him into that same close huddle of hands - he felt genuinely accepted. At the same time - it seemed natural to him because none of us got strange or wanted to wear pumps or anything.  He couldn't put his finger on it at first, but the entire group seemed very UNfag like to him.  Then - when he ended up in bed with Jase later on, -- & Jase smooth-talked him into a friendly "sword-fight"; - Well that's when Brad knew he was part of a group that was closer than family & did things that nobody outside the group would ever understand guys could do without giving up their manliness.  The fact that guys in the group talked about things like girlfriends -- and never referred to other guys as "girl" - & the fact that affection could be very intimate - even dick2dick coupling; - But nobody ever suggested for a second that a guys arsehole was part of that intimacy; -The boundaries made the group work as a guy-thing.  The comment, "Bro, you've got a nice a55..." was a genuine compliment about the guy's physique without the undertone that the complement-giver wanted to phuck-said-a55!  Brad said (& we all agreed in our unspoken mental vaults of manly knowledge) that people on the 'outside' would probably tend to make 'fag' comments about the way that members of our group showed lack of concern about close gentle contact - not because the critics were personally put off by it -- but because they had been sold the line that male2male intimacy equals 'gay' and 'gay equals girl-man'.  And, he added, that people on the outside of the group were constantly on guard about the peer pressure of others accusing THEM of being Girl-Men.  His final conclusion was (& we agreed as before) - that the extremes of the 'gays' created such a minefield of moral-distress that people in general we terrified to get close because they were dreadfully afraid that people would call them "fags" - implying that the acts of immoral-excess that "gays" were reputed to gleefully partake of, - were things that people would accuse anyone who got cuddly with a friend of doing. 

Jase made the observation that what the "gay" community said about themselves was very different than how we interacted with each other. He made the point: "Go into the gay-male part of the Nifty Stories Archives - and your mission - if you choose to accept it - is to: Find a story about gay guys in which they do N0T end up with a d1ck up an a55!  I've gotta admit - I took the challenge; -& time after time - awesome plot lines would get started & then destroyed because suddenly, - story characters were pounding arse (or had their tongue up there or something)!  Jase continued to comment that lots of guys in these "gay-stories" had a lower level of cleanliness than some breeds of pigs.  He was right.  Never had I read so many accounts where being dirty (as in grime, sweat, p1ss, & sh1t) was put on an 'erotic pedestal'.  "That's like going into a bakery & being talked into buying the spoiled, rotting stuff; -& told that you should like it the most." - Jase joked.  We agreed. It was the mind-job of a bunch of sick-phucks.  In our group - "fag" was a very dirty word, and "gay" was as big an insult.  Whatever WE WERE, it wasn't THAT; -- and we knew this was correct because we didn't do (by instinct) the very things that gay-culture itself seemed to esteem the most. 

This is why - over our remaining time in school - that were were able to grow in numbers like we did. Guys were discovering a level of friendship that was 'dangerous' to express openly - because of fag-rumors. On the other hand, guys on the inner circle knew that not only did our group not identify with "gay-culture", - but we were openly hostile to it - because we all saw it as a debasing of manhood instead of building each other up in mutual love & acceptance.  We were all of the basic opinion that any guy who wore the "gay label" was a butt-slut. Why? Because the guys all knew that the male sexual appetite has no satiation point. Any guy who says, "I have sex with guys." is opening the door for an endless stream of equally shallow guys who want nothing but a quick phuck.  At least - in our group, the slow posturing, the time to develop friendships & the emphasis we placed on respect of the man; --All these things worked together to create a strong filtering mechanism to prevent inappropriate behavior & advantage taking.  In our group - the closer the friendship translated directly into how often naked dicks got to kiss.  What we observed in the "gay-male community", was precisely the opposite - in so many ways).

Looking back - I suspect what our group had - happens more often than most people realize.  It went on for years under the noses of parents & peers. We wanted NOTHING to do with the "TOLERANCE GROUPS" - by whatever name they went by because to 'tolerate them' was to imply agreement with the notion that "everything goes" - & almost every guy knows - that isn't true.  We all knew: Men don't play the female role.  It was our saying.  It embodied respect & the social posturing of our extremely close inner circle.  Men don't play the female role.  That hard-line of understanding was a comfort zone for the guys on the inner circle. Everyone understood in absolute terms: "I won't be disrespected here. Nobody will ask me to abandon my manliness; - nor will I be ostracized for showing gentleness, affection, -or the need to love & be loved in this group".  Sissies, cowards & butt-phuckerz need not apply.  Yeah - we sure weren't politically correct - but we weren't spreading diseases either; - Despite the fact we never used condoms when M2M. No Arse-sex; -No STD's.  Imagine that.

I feel sorry for those schools that didn't have happen what happened in our's. It must be a horrible thing to have feelings of empathy & affections for your friends within a society that can't mentally separate male/male affection from the debasing actions proudly broadcast as "gay-sex" by that same minority of manhood emasculators.  It's a tragedy living in a society that mistakes the former for the latter.  It must be devastating to have to push gentle affections down & puff yourself up as some 'mindless cunt-plugging social projection' so that your peers (all playing the same sociopathic game of lies) will loudly affirm you with a simultaneous raucous of disregard for women!   All these LIES - because acting like a real gentleman (with empathy for men) is seen as on par (or in dangerous proximity) with being a butt-phuck'n, testosterone-resistant "fem-phreak".  At least we sorted the different aspects out early on. I'm so glad!

When I got older & moved away, - I realized that the inner circle had experienced our own "Pleasantville" phenomena in which we went from seeing in shades of grey to color - and not in the banded colors of the rainbow flag -where one snaps quickly to another - like people thinking in terms of "Straight, Bi or Gay"; --But a gradual transition - 16 million+ combinations! And we knew that the violet-end contained dangerous energies to be avoided: ULTRAVILOT, X-RAY, ALPHA, BETA, GAMMA -- all dark. All dangerous. Not everything 'goes'. 
As an engineer, you learn to see 'tolerance' as the marginal range of DEVIATION. Tolerance is HOW MUCH ERROR CAN BE DEALT WITH BEFORE IMMANENT FAILURE.  TOLERANCE is a danger zone; - dark unknowns -where the farther out you get, the more likely the wheels come off while moving.  Engineering for wide tolerances is expensive & hardly ever works well.  From a moral position -- how many times must we allow DEVIATION (by deviants) to result in actions that INJURE others?  Teaching "tolerance" is the WRONG lesson. Teaching where it's boundary lies is the right one.  Generally, society should TOLERATE someone swinging their arms - right up to before the point where they begin to hit noses;...And a culture that defines itself in terms of a disease & spreading disease should NOT BE TOLERATED.

- We were/are men who loved men without debasing or hurting the guys we loved. What a novel concept!