Ground ZER0 in the "UNgay" Paradigm Shift!

+60% of all men experience some SameSex attractions. You know that +60% is NOT a "minority", -right?
G0YS is testosterone driven (unlike so many 'gaycentric' groups). Because we 'have a pair', we speak from the perspective of men who don't tolerate the lawless rantings of fools. Our philosophy is simple: "Love works no ill.", & "No victim; -No crime". If you can't wrap your brain around those principles, -then you're in the wrong place!

Quick Links:

G0Y? Eh?
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The 'LINE':
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Head's up Dad!
Make'n L
Peeps 101
'Da 'Scene'
Aesthetics 101
Empathy is G0Y




What G0YS embrace is masculinity in it's purest forms.  Many G0YS might be GAY-identified, or (usually)-amBIsexual men (who might wear those labels IF they are not aware of the G0Y movement).  Many G0YS are STRAIGHT identified (involved in marriage or exclusive relationships with women) also - but have these deep feelings for masculine affection nonetheless (whether ever acted upon or not).  Many of these men have had 1 or more sexual encounters with other men (not anal) & lack the language to describe those feelings & relationships.  The term "gay" simply encloses too large a group & offensive associated stereotypes.  G0YS place friendships at the top of their proverbial "list".  Some of those friendships deepen to a level that is so intimate & personal that sexuality often becomes an element; -- & strong, invisible cords of love, respect & extreme-discretion cover what is an intensely personal thing.  The reputation of the flamboyance, promiscuity, filth & bizarre cross-culture of the term "gay" - is seen as an affront to g0y relationships. G0YS are not homo-phobic (as we readily admit that we are men who love masculinity).  Perhaps we're "PHREAK-O-PHOBIC".  We detest acts that degrade & disrespect masculinity; - & thereby diminish the man.  This is why we have adopted the term "G0Y" as opposed to "GAY" - & we offer no apology for our discretion in doing so. Also realizing that "GAY" is a slang, nebulous term (not a precisely defined word); -G0YS have chosen to form a separate group where "who we are" is tightly defined with an unmistakable term. Even if some people consider "G0YS" to be a subset of "GAY"; -We represent less than 5% of the "Gay Male" community -- while encompassing a much larger number of men who happen to have Same Gender Attractions (& may or may not have attractions for the other).  Using Kinsey's numbers to clarify: Gay's represent K-6's while G0YS encompass K-[1-6] men within behavioral constraints.  Because G0YS technically represent a much larger number of men than "gay"; -- it is actually inaccurate to consider us a subset of gay-male culture.

It's about the Connection

Out of the research I've done on the Internet about everything "gay" - It's been my observation & experience that being "g0y" is about the deep connection between a couple of men. That connection begins as a friendship that gradually deepens to the point where defenses come down & inhibitions drop as a bond of powerful affection grows - often beside an appreciation of each guy's masculine traits & physique.

And here's the astonishingly boring fact about what g0y relationships look like: On the surface - people usually only see a strong friendship.
Often - how deep that friendship goes - is invisible.  Like a couple of trees growing side by side - you can't tell how deep the roots go or how entangled they are.  People run across g0ys all the time and don't recognize it because g0ys aren't into advertising who they get naked with.  Remember this point: In the original vernacular, -the terms "Best Friends" implied a connection not seen nor realized by casual observations. As one g0y explained: "I gave a kidney to my g0y-buddy.  It was one of the easiest decisions I've ever made. I would have rather died myself in the accident that injured him - rather than to have lost a best-friend whom I loved from balls to brows. The expenses, pain, hospitalization & recovery didn't compare at all when contrasted to the relationship I was getting to keep in return."        

Love is a complex, wonderful language that expresses itself in many ways. Sharing property - such as living space, money or vehicles with another person makes a powerful statement. Sharing laughter, deep conversation & personal issues - likewise is often a strong step toward intimacy. Between a couple of men, reaching a point of trust where sharing touch, nakedness & mutual climax is the ultimate bond of intimacy between a couple of buds.

In my experience, there is a place in the heart of most men where they want affirmation from other strong, masculine men that affirms them as men & does not threaten their masculine core. Is this not exactly what sons want from their fathers on a basic emotional level? Likewise, guys shun 'sissy-bois' because sissies do not affirm a joint sense of masculinity. Aggressive boys can fight (& can choose when not to). Other men affirm that they recognize & respect this. But, that affirmation is one of outward roughness & shunning of external perceptions of weakness - often culturally necessary.

And what is the emotional reaction when one tough guy makes it clear that he values the other guy as much - even more than himself? How does the man feel who realizes that his friend will not raise a hand against him in conflict because his friend values him more as a person than his right to 'exact vengeance'?

I think we're beginning to uncover the difference in the feelings between the depths of masculinity vs. the petty vindictiveness of effeminate thoughts, acts & lifestyles of the cowardly. Being g0y is about the deep connection. Being g0y is about loving the wholeness of the other guy so much that the barrier to touch, closeness & emotional intimacy dissolve.

It is a deeply intimate & private thing - never to be lauded or flaunted. Being g0y is a mindset that says (often nonverbally) "Although I am a guy with an arsenal of assault weaponry as close as my fists, -- I value you so much that I want to make you feel good - & feel accepted by me - a peer." It says, "As a guy, being naked makes me vulnerable - but I trust you to be so with you.". It says, "As a guy, I know that being touched like this has great meaning & feels very good when done in proper context & with total respect; - & because I have such feelings toward you - I enjoy touching you in this way because I accept you totally & want to make you feel very good when near me." It says, "I accept you without reservation - from your embrace - to your hardened penis that is expressing your mutual feelings as it frantically disgorges the evidence of your reciprocated appreciation - as mine answers in kind.". It says, "Relax into my hug & into the afterglow's peace - with no anxiety, or fear - because you are loved & accepted as the virile guy you are; - And I affirm you because I am likewise, such a guy." It says: "I will never show other's your weaknesses or do anything that puts you in the light of compromise. I value the secret depths of our friendship so much that only with mutual consent would I ever disclose them."

Because this is the heart of being g0y - it is why the "gAy" community is virtually unaware of our presence & society does not comprehend our number. G0Y is about the "connection". It is about the sacred trust of love between guys who show their soft-undersides to each other in a paradigm of "being tough".

This is what men want & why so many who are in this group have come here. This is the focus of what so many guys write to me about. This is what is missing from the visage of the "gAy male community" as it thrusts it's arse into everyone's face.

We are the g0ys. The distinction is self-evident & if you knew who was among our numbers ... you'd be astonished!

When the term "GAY" was coined, --it originally meant "Same Gender Attracted".  G0YS have no problem with THAT simple definition. However, -as time passed, the term "GAY" became connected with cross-gender behaviors (which is why "intersexed" & "transgender" ride in the gay-pride passenger seats) & perilous acts such as AnalSex. In many places, the term "GAY-SEX" has come to equate "ANAL-SEX". G0YS completely reject that notion and find the ASSociation repugnant to our masculinity.  Please keep those distinctions in mind whenever you read a G0Y commentary critical of "The GAYS".  It is  not the original use of the term, --but what it has morphed into, -that g0ys find reprehensible (& "reprehensible" is perhaps, -too soft of a descriptor).


Yes! This website is where the g0ys movement sprang from!  Mouse-over the chart below. 

 Are G0YS Preoccupied with Sex?

On a website defining the term G0Y? YES. But to the degree SEX is integral w. LOVE.
Some people deny that philosophy. There are terms for people who deny such a notion: Hypocrites & Liars are 2 that come to mind.

G0YS also express the notion that SEX should never be perilous nor injure the participants physically or via diseases. Some people reject that stance. There are terms for people who reject such a notion: Criminals & Sociopaths are 2 that come to mind.

Love promotes no harm to others & so acts as a sound mentor for ethical behavior.

What's a G0Y
(& while we're talking about terms; - Do you even know where the term "GAY" came from?)

Origin from Biology: In the field of cellular biology, there is a state in mitosis where the cell is currently in between activity states. This condition is called, "G0" (Gee-Zero). This seemed an apt mnemonic to apply to the term "G0Y". Most men discover they are g0y shortly after puberty. In most cultures, this is too early to immediately start a family - so the time between puberty & when socially-typical pair-bonding occurs is similar to the "G0" state in cellular mitosis. Stem-cells have an observable "G0" state - after which they may become any number of things. Because G0YS generally recognize that most men are amBIsexual - what they may become in adulthood could be anywhere on Kinsey's scale. Once again, the "G0" comparison from cellular biology is on point.

Short Version
It comes up in chat rooms and conversations more & more: "That G0Y thing."  Everybody wants to comment with few seeming to actually read the website (which is intellectually dishonest & fucking stupid)... so, I've put this page up to TRY to explain (once again) what a g0y is:

G0YS (Spelled with a ZER0) are regular guys who happen to find men physically & emotionally attractive (/too), but (for whatever reason) are offended with the stigmas that currently define the 'gay community' in the public psyche.  G0YS recognize that the prominent facets of the "gay-male" community tend to embrace every gender-bending act, fetish & affectation; --And include those things in the general specter of the image that "gay" projects publicly.  The easiest to observe example is the commonly used acronym "GLITQetc." meaning Gay, Lesbian, Intersexed, Transgendered, Queer (or Questioning).  The fact that "GAY" is grouped with "Intersexed & Transgendered" is evidence to G0YS primary point showing what the term "GAY" has morphed into.  G0YS reject those associations completely & consider it a form of discrimination against men who merely love men(/too). 

And the fact g0ys say (/too) is also a hint that "G0YS" is NOT a "sexual orientation"!  A man can be anywhere on Kinsey's scale (except 0) and identify his attitudes as "G0Y" in nature.  In fact, -most men are generally g0y - based on statistics & studies done about male sexuality.  This is actually a gigantic point of fact that most people & publications fail to recognize.  G0YS is NOT a minority. G0YS represents the vast MAJORITY of men and describes what men actually FEEL & actually DO; -- As opposed to what most openly claim regarding an intimate context with other men. Again: G0YS is NOT a sexual orientation. It is simply a term that describes what most men feel towards others across Kinsey's 1-6 range while eliminating any notion of gender-fuck (& especially shunning all anal sex fetishes).

Anal-sex is innately shunned by g0ys - as it represents the ultimate form of perilous (as in +5000% MORE FUCKING DANGEROUS THEN FELLATIO) sexual disrespect whether male/male or male/female.  Other distasteful stereotypes include (but are not limited to): Campy/Effeminate behavior, extreme passivity (as cowardice), & gender-fuck (I.E: drag).  G0YS don't call other men "girl", "bitch", "queen", etc.  G0Ys embrace the strong androgenizing effects of testosterone; -Bracketed in a philosophy of sound ethics summarized in the expression that: "Love works no ill toward others". G0YS have expressed feelings about this way:

"Hey brother. Just discovered and I want to thank you for blowing the fucking lid off the perverse faggot conspiracy to induce men to degrade and demean themselves in another dude's asshole. There is nothing filthier than a man putting his dick where a dude takes a shit." - FD

"Hey g0ys, new guy here. It's great to see that there is a space for men who really love and admire masculinity in other men out of that horrid Top-Bottom bullshit dichotomy imposed by the LGBT+ community, never in my entire life have I ever dreamt of doing such a horrible thing to someone I'd deeply love and care for. I hope everyone's alright here, take care!" - JT

Kicking the Ass of False Religion by using Scriptures, Science & Fundamental Law!

G0YS also reject (due to well developed theology), the lax & lazy prejudices that have arisen in conservative fundamentalist religious circles against all same-gender sexuality.  In Christian circles, this travesty has arisen due to the extremely sloppy exegesis (& outfight fraud) of a handful of verses of Scripture, w. a total failure to rightfully divide the Word.  This becomes quite apparent when the theme of the New Testament is held up as a standard, & these anti same-gender teachings are examined in light of that themeVery briefly, Romans chapter (1) is a scathing commentary exposing temple prostitution & Anal-sex (Women w. men, & men w. men; -- N0T what is called 'homo-sex').  This is made very clear by other writings of Saul/Paul himself, & a warning from Peter about those who would misinterpret Paul's writings.  Paul writes that those who did these things received within themselves the due penalty for their perverse behavior - & that penalty was death.  Likewise, G0YS point out that Anal-Sex is the mechanism for the EXPLOSIVE SPREAD of Sexually Transmitted Diseases over the globe - many deadly.  The anus is not a sexual organ (genital) & treating it as such violates Moses' command "Not to bear false witness".  Scripture teaches that one of the very foundations of the faith involves "repentance from acts that lead to death".   G0YS believe that changing the meaning of the Romans (1) from being against anal-sex, to a focus on (& against) 'homo-sex', -simultaneously adds & deletes from the canon of Scripture; & carries the ultimate penalty for perverting the gospel.

The perversion of the Scriptural texts has led to the phenomena called the "Ex-Gay" ministry - which is an attempt by men to "fix" peoples sexual orientation.   Ex-gay programs are a mockery of the gospel & an accusation of the renewing power of God's Spirit.  Paul called such teachings "other gospels" & said that as far as he was concerned, the leaders of such movements were eternally condemned! Strong language! Caveat! See Galatians (ALL; & examine 3:28 carefully)

Why 'G0Y' -- spelled with a ZER0? What's up with that? Because the g0y movement was created as a departure from stereotype; -- A term was needed that had some meaning behind it, while being simple enough for people to remember; -- plus stir some curiosity. Because the movement also was designed to eviscerate abusive religion (primarily fundamentalism in its many forms), the term needed to have foundations in Scripture as well (Because there are now "gAy affirming churches", the term needed to confront sloppy theology that supports "everything gAy" -- including AnalSex). How was this all accomplished? Read on...

Ancient Hebrew, (the language the Torah & rest of the Old Testament was written in), - is an amazing language. In its original written form, it has no vowels. They are inferred. If we were to adopt the same technique for English, the words:
g0y (In Hebrew, the term "goy" applies to a non-Hebrew person -- foreign national)
... would all be spelled:
G Y; & the reader would place the vowel upon speaking based on context. Well, since English is NOT Hebrew, people might not "get it". However, something else also came to light ... and that was the fact that the Apostle Paul wrote that G0D chose the "thing which is N0T" to "NULLIFY things which are". He basically explained that G0D used the power of a ZER0 to establish His new covenant by canceling out the written code that stood in opposition to us. This worked out well, because by inserting a '0' between the 'G_Y', - the "A" in "GAY" was essentially zeroed out (see ... N0 Anal) and the new term formed was 3 characters & looks like it should be pronounced "goy" (a Hebrew term that rhymes with "toy" & fits context.) However, this new term is not really designed to be spoken, but rather EXPLAINED. So you see, this new term has some intellectual backing & some rich history!
But for those who consider this facts of basic male sexuality that have been well documented by researchers such as KINSEY; - G0YS constitute most regular GUYS. And because a ZER0 is NOT the letter "O", - the word "G0YS" could accurately be pronounced "G'YS" (GUYS)! And the way to know if someone has looked into the details of this website - is IF they know this! G0YS are GUYS; -& if you don't like labels ... considering yourself a regular GUY - gets you around the "label conundrum".  In that way - if you ever find yourself being probed by other people for a "sexuality label" - all you need to say is: "Hey, I'm just a GUY." -& people who understand basic male sexuality will understand perfectly - while you'll avoid being slapped with the label "Homo" in any of the bizarre contexts that people who do NOT understand male sexuality apply it. G0YS are simply most regular GUYS! Shhhhhhhhhhh.

"You're 'GAY'. Get over it!" - Ms. Blah Blah

G0YS are constantly being accused of being "gays in denial".  After all, G0YS are guys who love guys/too. And for some people, -that's what they think the word "GAY" means. And early on, -it sorta did. Although the vast majority of men have no idea where the term "GAY" was actually coined!

However, word meanings change over time, and eventually, -society at large came to have a different perception of a word once used in a different context.  And "GAY"? Well, it was a slang term in the very beginning. Being slang, -the definition was soft from the beginning. It still is; --And g0ys find the fluidity of the term to be part of what makes it so offensive to us.  When you say "GAY", many people relate the term to vastly different meanings - many implications being offensive to g0ys. 

Who says the "AssFuck Act" uniquely identifies the
"gay camp"?

... Almost Everyone ...

Even One of the biggest global customized item printers!

Twice - over a 3 year period, the image above was submitted to the same gigantic printer for production on custom clothing.
The submission was denied by the printer - on the grounds that it was "DISCRIMINATORY".

Not "obscene".

Not "adult".

Not "tasteless".

It is a design that clearly is against the act of (as you can see); --Yet is was deemed "discriminatory" by the printer!
Well ... "WHO" was it allegedly "DISCRIMINATING" against?
I think it's obvious who the "WHO" is - that the printer said the design was being "discriminatory" against.

And we found that decision ASStonishing! Because, it reinforces what G0YS have been saying for over a decade: "The term 'GAY' has come to be synonymous with 'AnalSex". And in a bizarre coincidence - one of the largest mass-customization companies on the planet happens to agree with 0ur ASSessment of the ArseFuck!

"GAY" = "AssFucker"
One of the biggest commercial custom-printers says so!

And THAT is the STIGMA that the GAY COMMUNITY has been willingly ASSociated with.
And that STIGMA is the very ASSociation that g0ys was formed to distance ourselves from!

Are G0YS exaggerating the "gAy" perspective.  Are "gAy" men that preoccupied with ? Let's ask G00GLE.  Upon typing "gay sex explained" into the search engine -the very top listing out of over 75-fuck'n-million subject matches is shown above.  And keep in mind that such a position in the listing is directly related to the number of clicks the link gets relative to other links that are clicked more or less.  

Since G0YS reject anything to do with the "Top/Bottom" AnalSex paradigm, G0YS reject the very subject matter that "gAys" esteem the highest! GAYS are MEN WHO FUCK ASS.  GOOGLE exposes that the GAYS themselves say so.

Why don't g0ys even try to "fit in" at all? Well, it's about empathy.  G0YS highly esteem empathy. Empathy is about seeing from the perspective of another person and trying to model one's behaviors so that the other person would be built-up in whatever dimension/s that the interaction/s involve.  Sexually speaking, --empathy is the mindset that desires the other guy's experience to be a good one, too.  Empathy does not derive pleasure in putting others in pain, peril or in need of pall-bearing.

Empathy is inherently incompatible with AnalSex (The risk, pain, smell, humiliation & self-deprecation).  You see, G0YS feel that AnalSex is the staple of PrisonSex stories. G0YS believe that it is the very epitome of a mindset bent on abusing another person. It is ALWAYS a violent act because it ALWAYS inflicts injury on the recipient. Say "Always".

Butt, how do the "gAys" explain why some men who love men do not engage in AnalSex (about 20% of men who openly-identify as "GAY" claim to shun the ButtNasty - and generally identify with g0ys when they hear that such a group now exists).  By clicking on that very G00GLE-link shown (upper right) ... there was another that went to a page that explained the reason -with this hypothesis: According to Raymon J, "Anal penetration is one of our closest physical connections. Many prefer there be feelings associated with that level of closeness. So, some men abstain from anal unless they have an emotional connection with their partner."!

Huh? G0YS say it's just the opposite! AnalSex is the result of a LACK of emotional connection (lack of empathy); --  Because it's ALWAYS an act of ASSault.  

Judge for yourself: What form does "GAY PORN" most often take? ANAL -nearly 100% of it.  Is this because "GAY PORN" is so emotionally compelling?  Women - who also have arses, -occasionally find themselves being asked to do the buttnasty.  Do most women feel that AnalSex is their "closest physical connection"? Perhaps some do (which explains where most lawyers come from); --But I strongly suspect the majority don't. Can you see the couple on their honeymoon now? What does the bride say when the groom explains: "I love you so much, -that I'm going to fukk you up the arse!"?  Raymon J. thinks it happens most of the time becuase the act is so "emotionally connecting". MOST WOMEN WOULD DISAGREE. Butt Raymon probably thinks that it's the woman's idea, too. Besides being Fukk'd in the arse, --Raymon J. seems Fukk'd in the head!  And every guy with a healthy sense of self-esteem knows it.   I think Raymon is a self-justifying, delusional arse-pounder; -But hey: you say.  See, sex is about genitals, not arses.  Men who think the arse is a genital organ only demonstrate that they keep their head up one.

Understanding masculine EMPATHY is where the Ramons of the world are emotionally bankrupt (which is why they emulate shemales by pushing penetration up their 'manginas').  Being a guy who truly loves guys, I see arse-pounders as a group of pseudo-men that other men (especially young, questioning, impressionable & naive men) need to be shielded from both physically & socially.  The reason we care is because G0YS have genuine emotional empathy & concern for those men who may be deceived & victimized by the gigantic lies told by the AssClowns who spread over 95% of all the diseases in the M2M community.  Yeah - that's another little factoid that Raymon left out: His AnalSex'd RumpRanger buddies spread over 95% of the STD's within the so-called "gay" community via AnalSex!  And they want our kids to follow their deadly lead by trying to soften the statistics.  Butt, the fact that "GAYS" are so preoccupied with AnalSex is why a man who claims the title of "GAY" is at least +4300% more likely to have a serious STD than the population at large!  Yeah: OVER FOUR THOUSAND FUKK'N PERCENT! Say: "GAY PLAGUE". Source of information: American Red Cross.

According to the FDA, men who have had sex with other men represent under 10 percent of the U.S. population, yet accounted for at least 60 percent of all new HIV infections in the U.S. in 2010. Hello!

G0YS have essentially rejected the "A" in gAy.  From observation & personal experience, there are more g0ys, than gAys (read that statement a few times) -- and many men who once thought of themselves as 'gAy' (often in secret) are discovering the 'g0y' movement & flocking to it in droves...because it's what they've been all along.  Read the e-mail we get here & you'll see this is without debate.  The fact that many guys have their first sexual experience with another guy (almost always FROT; --very rarely ever anal,) is evidence to the fact that g0ys are all around us our entire lives (Because if Jonny cuddled you till you came in junior-high, -- he's still able to experience those same feelings today [pay no attention to the camouflage ... eh, - the female, with him now]).  It's just that social stigmas against 'gAys' by coincidence, oppress 'g0ys' via those who may not yet be aware of the distinction between men who are tender on men, vs. men who arse-fuck men.    Obtuse minds cannot see the distinction, but to those whom it applies, it's as clear as empty space.  If disease statistics are used as a measure of morality, - then g0ys are among the most moral segment of the population, while 'gAys' constitute the opposite.  Therefore, the "A" in 'gAy' also may mean: "Antagonistic" to life.

So, we have defined our own term - one that many men can relate to without the confusion allowed by slang & soft definitions.  "G0Y" is our word and we have precisely defined what "G0Y" means.     

The extreme irony is that many, many men who call themselves "GAY" will insist that G0YS are NOT "GAY", anyhow. Why? G0YS absolutely reject Anal-Sex. And "GAYS"; --Are ALL about Anal-Sex. Seriously. It's not simply a stereotype. It (Anal-Sex) has become the "DEFINING GAY ACT". Ask any search engine on the Internet. Clicking the box below/right will poll G00GLE in real time.

G0YS reject Anal-Sex! It's dirty, dangerous & damn - disrespectful of masculinity. 

And, most self-professed "GAY" men insist that Anal Sex is the "DEFINING GAY ACT".  Not G0YS!

So, G0YS reject the very core of what GAY men say it is to be "GAY". 

When people say "GAY" today, -AnalSex is what comes to mind as does the showcase of "bizarre" gender-bending seen in "GAY PRIDE" parades.  "GAY" is a term with lots of baggage - now welded to it.  It doesn't simply mean what it once did.  

That assertion stands in contrast with those who insist that simply loving your own gender makes one "GAY".  

So, what is the truth? What is "Gay today"?

Let's ask G00GLE:  As of 05/27/2014

With the search terms shown, -this is a screenshot of the topmost search-engine page (image right) - which means that G00GLE's search engine identified the content of these pages to be what people wanted to see FIRST.  The search results will change slightly over time, but I suspect that the content will remain generally the same (until society grows some real balls). Click the chart to see where things are today.

Every link makes our point about anal-sex being "gay-sex" and you'll notice the #2 link is a Wikipedia article on ANAL SEX (but wait: I searched for "GAY SEX" - not "ANAL-SEX"). Notice how society so easily interchanges the terms!  And G0YS, by our very nature, -find that implication morally reprehensible. Why should G0YS be expected to be connected to an act that we find detestable; --An act that happens to be the very PRIMARY act ASSociated with the term "GAY" & the vast majority of sexually transmitted diseases!

I want to draw your attention to the 3rd link - which is actually an OK article about accepting your own same-gender attractions. It's not about "sex" at all, but about attraction.  However, the author then goes on to explain how terms such as "same sex attraction" are actually divisive terms and that "gay" should be the standard.  G0YS disagree. See, the author doesn't question for a moment the CONTEXT of the term "GAY" in light of the massive public perception of the IMPLIED meaning/s - clearly shown in the example.  And it is this exact form of shortsightedness that g0ys specifically point out regarding the loose-use of the term "GAY".  

One voice may say that mere same-gender affection is what "GAY" is. Meanwhile, the vast majority of  MILLIONS imply that "GAY" actually means: "Gender Bending & Anal Sex".  

So, what can men do if they have same gender attractions and do not relate whatsoever to the overwhelmingly loud spectre of "GAY" stereotypes?  What can men do - who actually find such widely promoted "GAY" stereotypes to be extremely personally & morally offensive?  

Words are Important - Beyond Words
A Tale of Two Pet Shops

In a town, very close to you, there are (2) pet stores.  The more flamboyant of the (2) is owned by Percy & Perry Gay.  They sell reptiles. (2) of the reptiles are pictured above.  Each is a snake - that is red. And that is all the information the store owners care to know about these snakes.  They have many -- all in the same cage labeled "Red Snakes - make swell pets". 
One cage. Lots of snakes. Percy & Perry don't discriminate. (Made that rhyme myself)

Across the street is the other pet store. It's owned by Mr. G0Y (probably a foreigner) and his silent business partner.  Mr. G0Y DOES discriminate regarding the very reptiles that the Gays simply call "Red Snakes".  Look carefully at the above close-up of the (2) snakes.  As it turns out, -the snake with the yellow in it's tongue & blue in it's eyes is a venomous species! The other is not.  Do you suppose that the venomous species makes a "swell pet" (Or is it more likely to make your other pets, swell?)?
So then: The fact that each is a "red snake" is not the most important distinction, -is it?  Being the case, - Mr. G0Y has (2) containers, -each with a slightly different name for the different species; -And with a loud warning sign on the cage housing the "Venomous-Reds". Oddly, to explain this distinction to their weary customers, -the "Gays" accuse Mr. G0Y of being "discriminatory" and segregating snakes by eye & tongue color. "How politically incorrect & back-woods to be so petty!", - the Gays exclaim about Mr. G0Y!  The Gays accuse Mr. G0Y because they do not want to change the way they do business nor admit they may be marketing death to the unknowing.  Of course, -this vital lack of moral discrimination completely confounds Mr. G0Y. He believes that the Gays are completely self-centered, narcissistic, petty sociopaths, -perhaps insane (I'll let you be the judge).

So: Not all snakes that are red are the same. The subtle differences are the differences between life & death! Likewise: Not all men who love men - are "GAY". The subtle differences are the differences between life & death! Discrimination can be a very positive thing when done for important reasons. Details matter. Go G0Y!

But, ultimately: Being a g0y is about your sum-empathetic-attitude towards men.   If the guy is draped across you naked & you need to know if you see him in the right light (as a g0y); - then here's your g0ydom test: Imagine that the future-phone rings and it's the hospital telling you that the guy (that you're in bed with in the now) has been in an accident and can't drive himself home.  If you're willing to go out of your way & burn a few hours (maybe days) to help the guy you're currently wrapped around, - then yeah: Odds are that your attitude meets g0y ethics.  If you can't say "Yes" to that scenario - then you probably don't deserve the naked intimacy of the guy you're with (and you've either overstepped where you should be in the relationship; - Or, you're simply a self-centered douchebag in general). Simple, eh?

It's sad - the large number of "GAY" men who can't say "yes" in good-faith to that scenario.  That's because the "GAY-scene" at-large, isn't about love; - But about selfishly using people.  Anyone who has seen the "scene" knows this is true. Assholes abound.